Sunday, February 3, 2008

"Something New", "let go, let flow" and what I'm looking for

This weekend I received the movie "Something New" from Netflix and watched it last night. I remember seeing a preview and wanting to see it, so I added it. Here's a movie review you can read to give you a little info on the movie if you haven't seen it.

Kenya McQueen is a successful African-American CPA, working her way to the top of the corporate ladder -- but her life has become all work and no play. Urged on by her friends to try something new and to let go of her dream of the "ideal black man," she accepts a blind date with an architectural landscaper named Brian, only to cut the date short upon first sight, because Brian is white. The two meet again at a party, and Kenya hires Brian to landscape her new home. Over time, they hit it off, but Kenya's reservations about the acceptance their romance will find among her friends and family threatens everything.

I'm pretty sure that it was just God divinely orchestrating me to see this movie! The main characher, Kenya, was TOTALLY me! I personally don't think that I'm as extreme as she was, but we definitely had a lot of the same characteristics in common; such as "The List" and the "I don't do ______ (ex: red hair). If you ask my friends, they would probably say that it's totally me! It was really eye opening for me to watch this movie. The issues in the movie focused more on interacial dating, but Kenya and her friends in the beginning of the movie, set the goal to change their lifestyles and try something new. They made fun of Kenya for having her "list" and told her she was never going to find love if she didn't let go and be more open. Their motto was to "let go, and let flow"~basically meaning to step out of their dating comfort zone and look outside the "dating box".

I won't tell you how the movie went, but I'll just say that I REALLY liked it and you definitely need to go and rent it if you haven't!

I have compiled a list of lessons that I learned from this movie and also my own beliefs of what God keeps whispering to me:
  • there is no such thing as the "perfect man" that I've imagined in my head. However, I do believe that there is the perfect man that God has created for me to be my husband.
  • I need to let my old "List" go. It's not important what color hair he has, what his name is, what he drives, what he does for a living, where he lives, etc.
  • I need to be open to dating people who I might not have thought about dating before.
  • I need to step out of my "dating comfort zone".
  • Again and again I need to keep giving it to God, and remember that what I have imgained for myself is NOWHERE near good enough as what He has planned for me!
  • I have confessed and cried out to God the desires of my heart! He knows them..I have to stop acting like He's going to forget what they are.
  • The only thing that I need to do right now is continue to pray for my future husband, and live my life glorifying my Savior, until the day that my future husband pursues me.

So, after watching this movie and thinking about it, I have compiled a new "List". When people ask me what I'm looking for in a guy (which has been a lot recently), I can just tell them this:


  1. He must be a godly, Christian, man who is actively pursuing a growing relationship with Christ!
  2. He must be the godly leader of our household!
  3. He must love and want to have children one day!
  4. He must be able to provide for our family (money is not an long as he can provide for us, that's all that matters to me)!
  5. He must be passionate~about Christ, about me, and about life!
  6. He must have evident the fruits of the spirit (love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, gentleness, self control) in his life!
  7. He must be willing to stand up and fight for what he believes in, and fight for me!
  8. He must love me enough to not always let me get my way, stand up to me when I'm being unreasonable, and not let me wear the pants in the relationship. *I know some of you are shocked with this one, but believe me..I can be very intimidating! Let's just say that I'm a lot to handle and my husband is going to have to hold his own! ;0)
  9. He must pursue me!
  10. He must sweep me off my feet!
  11. He must give me butterflies in my stomach, make me go weak in the knees, and make me feel like I'm the most gorgeous woman in the world!
  12. He must treat my like a princess, because I really am. Jesus is my King, and I'm His daughter which makes me a princess!
  13. He must love me like Christ loved the church!

Ok, so that's what I've compiled so far. I'm sure that I will think of something to add or change. Feel free to add your own suggestions if you can think of anything to add to the new "List"!

In conclusion, I, Chelsey Sue Snodgrass, from this day forward, promise to "let go, and let flow" or "let go, and let God!"


Amanda said...

isn't it so crazy when you see a movie like that and can totally relate to it?!

cassandrasaganwebb. said...

I loved this post! Screw "the list." I never once thought that my husband would be...short. LoL. But ya know, he's MORE than I ever expected.

Just keep an open mind and don't limit yourself to a certain standard (except the God stuff, of course). And you're man is perfect. No woman is perfect. Sometimes you have to just let the faults hair and all ;)

cassandrasaganwebb. said...

Oh, and in not limiting yourself to a certain standard, be sure not to LOWER your standards, either...'cuz that's yucky.

Erica said...

Good list, Chelsey. It focusing on qualities you're looking for, rather than specific characteristics. You don't know how it's going to be wrapped, but you know what you want in the pacakage.

Kelly Sellers said...

I liked this post a lot. So cute! and I have a couple things to relate my situation with your old list, which I'm glad you have 'let go' of. It's really refreshing isn't it, letting go?...ok so here it goes.
:Chad was not who I always pictured...tan, athletic, taller, preppy, etc. so your dreams can still come true...because he's hotter to me the way he is than any tall, athletic, preppy guy i could have ever found.
:keep your standards and rid yourself of specifications...CHECK! way to go!:)i did the same thing and look what happened!
:stepping out of my "box" was definitely dating a military guy...i knew better, lol. jk. i wouldn't change it for the world, but i would have never seen myself marrying into the military about 3 years ago, NO WAY! :) haha. funny how things change!
:getting out of my comfort zone was giving in to a forced long distance relationship, which many probably know i was always AGAINST! i tried it though, and we pulled through it miraculously! and it's only trained us better for life together now...interesting how God works sometimes!
:understand God would never send you anything but an outstanding and Godly man and believe in yourself enough to know you would never settle for less than the best.


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